awesomeness of the week, sort of

okay, it was last week, but I WON THE WEEK'S BIGGEST LOSER!!!  I won a stupendous $4 (since only 4 people weighed in) AND *trumpet fanfare* Supreme Dumpster Parking!  It would figure that the week I won the primo parking, the library would be closed for 3 days!  

Oh well, the spot is mine tomorrow and Wednesday then I will graciously hand my dumpster crown to the next lucky contestant.  We've been doing this for maybe 5 or 6 weeks now and I've lost over 15 pounds..not too shabby!  

I'll always be forthcoming about my progress and I have a little My Success sidebar item where I keep tabs on my Monday weighins.  That is where I weigh myself at home, first thing in the morning and um...without apparel.  Anyway, moving on, my weighins at work take place on Wednesdays and I am usually 2-3 pounds heavier having eaten breakfast and having drank (drunk?) at least 32 oz of water by the time I get to work and wearing at least a couple of pounds of clothes.  So, I don't really count that on the BIG CHART I keep at home.

I'm having a great holiday weekend so far.  My petsitting job ended so I get to spend a few days at home until the next one starts on Thursday.  Yesterday I hung out with my mom, aunts, and grandmother.  Mom was cooking steaks but I told her not to get me one and I bought some amberjack instead.  While she was grilling, I threw it in some foil with garlic, onions, olive oil, a bit of lemon juice and a modest pat of butter.  It was the best thing I've had in forevah!  And it felt indulgent so I didn't feel deprived.  At 8.99/lb, it was more expensive than the steaks anyway :-)

Mom filled a 9x13 with quartered red onion, squash she grew in the garden, baby carrots (from the store), and fresh string beans she talked some farmer into letting her pick.  Add some olive oil and sea salt and bake covered for about an hour.  I had myself the most delicious, earthy, sunshine tasting meal yesterday.  That's what I told mom, that I could taste the sunshine in those beans.  I brought some home with me, yay!

For the first time in a long time, I really feel like I can do this.  I can have a different life AND enjoy it.  I can be the person I feel like on the inside.  It'll take awhile, but I'll get there and I truly believe that this time I won't let it slip away again.  I've done that so many times in the past and I am a better person than that.  I am a stronger person than that, I guess I just needed the reminder that I am not weak and I am not a failure, that I am just fighting against a terribly strong enemy....that would be my own foolish brain!  That reminder, for me, was the book I just finished, The End of Overeating: Taking Control of the Insatiable American Appetite by David Kessler!  That's all you get for now as I'll be reviewing it shortly for my 100+ Reading Challenge.